Sunday, June 15, 2014

let it go

If you think this post has anything to do with the movie "Frozen", you are reading the wrong blog.

In honor of Father's Day, I feel it important to share my story. It's incomplete and confusing, sad and interesting all at once.

I have two fathers.

I have one father who cares for me. Takes care of my mother and younger sister. Is a grandfather to my baby. Raised 8 children only to take on 4 more.  Has overcome obstacle after obstacle.

He came to our family when we were broken. Even though he had his own trials, he took ours on without even skipping a step. He picked up the pieces and helped us try to move on. 

Teenage years? He conquered 12. Not one complaint. 

He took on 4 rowdy teenagers that all chose to rebel, nearly at the same time. Over time, we have come to realize the blessing he is every day. He was the savior that pulled us all back together.

It took several years for us all to get to where we are today. Many many long nights spent explaining why things are the way they are. 

I have another father, my biological father whom I don't know his story. My relationship with him ended a few years ago. Through the lies, drama and pain he caused my family, we had to let go. We made the decision that we needed to move on with our lives, and in order to do that relationships needed to be severed. His life is a mix of booze, debt, drugs, homelessness and favors that are never returned. Relying on others and draining them of every last ounce of kindness before leaving them in the dust. 

The memories I have of my father consist of lies and empty love. Depression that rules his everyday life impacts him to a point where he can't even function, let alone have any relationships. That is how I remember spending time with him.

A father is a daughters first love and a sons first hero. The impact he has on their lives is beyond important, it's vital. 

I'm so grateful that my daughter gets to grow up in a family where she knows she can rely on her father and look up to him. He will be there to support her and give her the love that only a father can provide.

I know that our experiences have brought us closer as a family.

apartments at their...finest


I've decided to make a reappearance.

Long story short-Taylor is starting a new job this week so baby and I are all by ourselves for the whole week! aaaaand we are moving in 3 weeks.

To start the moving celebration off right, I'm going to make a list of all the absolutely dreadful things about our current apartment.

Okay let's be honest here. The down and dirty truth. 

#1: we live on the main floor of an old house. That means there are people above and below us. 

#2: we no longer fit in with the "young college couple" crowd making the 2am parties downstairs sooooo annoying. Wake up my baby and I will cut you.

#3: our apartment is a dump. Sure, it's a cute old house, but the carpets smell like old lady and no amount of BBW wall flowers will change that.

#4: one bedroom with a baby=bad idea. Always.

#5: our kitchen isn't really a kitchen. It's small. And there isn't any counter space. Pantry? HA.

#6: ever heard the phrase "ward of newly weds and newly deads"?

#7: public laundry room. Thinking about running to the laundry room bra-less to throw in a pair of jeans? Don't. Your creepy land lord is back there.

#8: this apartment that is already icky is expected to be spotless when we leave. How is that even possible?

I can't wait to mooooooove!

Want to share a dreadful apartment living story? Comment below!

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Goodbye, for now!

I'm taking a blog-cation and I don't know if I'll be back.

I'm focusing on being a better mommy and wife, wish me luck!

Follow me on Instagram @mrschanwood 

Sunday, March 2, 2014

whirlwind of a week

This week has been utterly chaotic.

I'm slowly learning that things don't always go the way you want them to! 

.....and that sometimes that has to be okay, even when it's not.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014


Our sweet baby is two months old! At two months Sofie: loves to wiggle! She loves when we lay her on the floor so she can kick kick kick! She is very quick to let is know when she is getting tired :). She sleeps soo good at night! We put her down somewhere between 8-10 and she will only wake up for one feeding before 8 am. It's really nice! During the day she also loves to be held. If she falls asleep and we lay her down she wakes up! This little girl loves napping in her mamas arms. I'm sure this will never change, but she loves snuggling with her daddy! Taylor picks her up to snuggle her and she is in instant heaven and so am I. So grateful for this little one in our lives.

Monday, February 10, 2014


Early morning smiles.
Poop grunts.
Little sighs.
Toothless smiles.
Wide blue eyes.
Little legs kicking in the bathtub.
Wide mouthed yawns.

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Monday, January 13, 2014

One Month

Our sweet baby is one month old!
At one month, Sofie Dean LOVES snuggling with her Daddy. As soon as Taylor gets home from work, he takes her and they just snuggle for like, an hour! She just loooooves it!
She is really tall! Her hands and feet are huge! She is still wearing newborn clothes, but socks don't fit her long toesies!
She loves to have her face stroked when she is falling asleep.
Has the sweetest half-smiles that melt my heart!
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